domingo, 22 de marzo de 2009

Cali Scene, Social Stereotypes I

Criollo Scene
Social Stereotypes I


(Case of Cali Scene )

"If you have at least 4 of this facts, you belong to the Cali Scene:"



*We are easily influenced by social standars and customs

Female Scene (sometimes male scene)

• We iron our hair.
• We talk to much about our hair.
• We color our hair as you change your underwear.
• We tag and comment thousand of people that we don’t even know.
• We easily fall in love of people who we don’t even know
• We take pictures of ourselves at least 15 times at day.
• We take pictures of ourselves wearing dresses that we don’t even buy.
• We don’t use correct spelling.
• We call ourselves as Parces, Zungas, Mozas, Perras, Mamis, Gonorreas, Maricas.

Curious Fact

• Cali scene girls and Colombian Scene girls in general have an odd aberration to call themselves with all the possible combinations of tinkerbell...(Campanita)

Geek, Nerd, Postmodern, Artist Scene

• We talk about ourselves and the colombian problematic showing to everybody our brilliant and magnificient intellectuality.
• We are surrounded by Geek friends.
• We are surrounded by Postmodernist friends.
• We are surrounded by kleptomaniac friends.
• We are surrounded by Borderline friends.
• We are surrounded by Alcoholic friends. (almost all of them drink Jack Daniels or Jose Cuervo, they never, never drink cheap alcohol) .
• We use dictionary words that just we are able to understand.
• We know about every photograph exposition, art exposition or international artist forum.
• We are surrounded by ponies, dwarves, vampires, fairies and powerangers.

General Scene

• We are surrounded by alcoholic friends( Almost all of them « chirretes » cheap alcohol consumers).
• We are drunk almost all the time, if we are not drunk, we look like if we are

We like to say :

-Hablamelo!
-Parce!
-Mucha gonorrea!
-Que gonorrea!
-Paila!
-Re-paila!
-En la mala!
-Sisas!
-Una chimba!
-Que chimba!
-Tan chimbo, tan chimba!
-Abrite! (get out of here).
-Está puto!(he is angry).
-Está puta! (she is angry).
-Todo bien, Parce!
-No aguanta!
-Que cinta!
-Mucha hembra (hembra “means” women).
And even more…

And also our particular speaking from Cali Scene:

-“¡Entonces que !” and “¡hablamelo!” mean: « hello » or the abreviation ¡tonces ke !
-¡Vos si no!
-¡Y vos ke?! (what’s up with you?).
-¡Mira ve! (hey!).
-¡Onde es ke es?! (where is?).
-¡Ya te montaste en el MIO! ( Did you go into the MIO).
-¡Venis Ve! (Do you come?).
-¡Me ois! (Do you listen to me?).
-¡Y pa onde es que es! (Where is the party?).
-¿Vecino me lleva en mil? (Could you take me for one thousand pesos?).
-¡Le dieron un traque! (somebody hit him).
-¡Se casco! ( he hit himself).


• We normally say: “Regalame un chorro” when we don’t have enough Money to buy alcohol and we want to get drunk for free.

• We like to go to Univalle university, particulary to “banderas” even If we don’t study there.

• We like to say when we don’t have any friend to go out: No hay parche.
• We refers to the place of Social concentration : Hay esta todo el parche.
• We say « gringo » to the people from other contries, It doesn’t matter if is not from USA.
• Most of us don’t speak english very well, but we know how to say:

-Fucker
-Motherfucker
-I am the motherfuckin
-Dog
-house

And we can combine :
-The fuckin dog is in the motherfuckin house

• And also we can say the word « Fucking » accompanied by different nouns such as : Fuckin house, fuckin job, fuckin traffic.


• We normally get drunk with Aguardiente Blanco sin Azucar:

“Aguardiente Blanco”, Sin Azucar it’s our most representative liquor, so there is “Aguardiente blanco”everywhere, when we don’t have enough Money, we buy “el caneco” that means, the half of a bootle.


• We like to drink “poker” and “costeña” beer.

• We enjoy the traqueto culture, so we consider the girls with big bubbies (tetonas), with big fat ass(culonas) and butheads like the Traqueto official girlfriend.

• We considered the men who wears Dolce and Gabanna and has “tetonas” and “culonas” girls as a traqueto men.

• We enjoy the Cali Fair with aguardiente Blanco, there is not Cali fair without aguardiente blanco and “tetonas” and “culonas” girls.


• We can get drunk with the cheapest and dangerous Liquor ... as chirrinchi ( almost all the time is mixed with a powder juice called frutiño) Moscatel, valle Alto and Chicha...we don’t care if the next day we have diarrhea or a severe intoxication that includes vomit in different colors.

These are another Facts of Cali scene:

Music Bands Scene

• Anyone can have a music band, even If you don’t play any instrument, you don’t have any instrument or if you don’t have any talent. Only requirment : Music Myspace Profile

• We go to the “tokes” that means « concerts », but we never pay the entrance or we stay outside “haciendo farandula” that means : talking with everyone.

• Ignore the last facts if you are friend of any member of Silicona Valley band, you are already a Cali-Scene member.



I will appreciate your comments and if you dislike something, please let me know.

As soon as I can I’ll have the spanish version on my blog


7 comentarios:

Anónimo dijo...

:S

Anónimo dijo...

:S

Anónimo dijo...

If you are not from Colombia, you are not going to understand :S

...Y si es de Colombia, y especialmente de Cali, aguante que ya casi lo pongo en español y corrijó el que está en inglés lo más pronto posible,...por que cuando lo escribí estaba re-paila y tenia mucho sueño.

Att
Johvana

... dijo...

I guess I better not come to Cali then... I am not into my hair and I do not drink. Even though I am a nerd, I am not a poser... Hmmmmm, maybe I should just go straight to Ecuador, hahaha!

Anónimo dijo...

falto en frases: "Mamasita Rika y Apretaitaa".

XD

Anónimo dijo...

"We refers to the place of Social concentration : Hay esta todo el parche."

En esta parte, ese "hay" está mal usado, es "ahí" ya que te estás refiriendo a un lugar.

Muy bacanos todos tus textos :D

Johvana Bhelem dijo...

Gracias a todos por los comentarios.

Y gracias por las observaciones, las tendré en cuenta. :)

Picos!